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Time to Resign? Navigating the Emotional Landscape of Leaving

Career Tips Thought Leadership Management tips Management and Leadership Article Retention
By Ash Athawale, Senior Vice President, Robert Half The act of resigning from a job can be heavy with emotional undertones, especially when the employee-employer relationship has been a good one. And I’ve seen incredibly strong feelings come out on both sides of the conversation. Good leaders want their employees to make a smooth transition, and good employees want to leave a positive legacy, which means everyone should be aware of and able to navigate this important transition successfully.
Employees may experience a complex mix of relief and excitement about new opportunities, marinated in guilt over leaving colleagues and fear about stepping into the unknown. So, to anyone considering leaving, let me advise that such complicated feelings are normal. Resignation marks an end as well as a beginning; it carries elements of both grief and hope. First, the practicalities of resignation. It’s a good idea to have a friendly conversation with your boss to explain your decision, typically at least two weeks before the leaving date. Have an open and honest discussion and express your gratitude for the opportunities you’ve had. Then follow up with a formal resignation letter. The next priority is to ensure a smooth transition, finishing up any projects you’re working on and supporting your colleagues as they take over your responsibilities. Showing your colleagues or your replacement the ropes demonstrates your conscientiousness and professionalism. It’s also a way to keep your legacy alive. Think the long hours you spent setting up and refining your work processes or bonding with clients. This way your efforts live on. Some organizations offer an exit interview, and my advice is to take that offer. And if they don’t — make that offer. This is a great way for you to share thoughtful and honest feedback with your manager and leaders. Limit your comments to the positive — areas of improvement for the company, operational suggestions, what the company does well, etc., — and avoid focusing on the personal or individual. Finally, stay on the high road as you depart the workplace. Resist the urge, even privately with colleagues, to unload frustrations and analyze workplace dynamics now that you may feel less constrained. In fact, I advise employees to keep discretion in place indefinitely, and to leave the workplace behind — literally. Stay in touch with work colleagues socially or through professional networks if you like, but let the job part of it go. Letting go will help you focus on your new opportunity and integrate into your new work “family.” And you need to let your old employer move on from you.  For more insights on leaving your job gracefully, see How to Resign the Right Way: Do’s and Don’ts.
Despite regular check-ins and one-on-ones, employee resignations can still catch managers by surprise. It may be worth noting that according to Robert Half’s Demand for Skilled Talent report, 36% of U.S. workers plan to look for a new job in the first half of 2024 or already have a search in progress. More money is the main motivator, followed by better benefits, flexible work and career advancement. Managers blindsided by the resignation of a valued team member may experience emotional reactions ranging from disappointment to worry over maintaining team continuity and morale. For managers who may be newer to the emotional side of resignation, it helps to recognize employee turnover is natural, healthy cycle for an organization and not a failure on anyone’s part. So it’s a good idea to have a plan you can work when an employee comes in to have that critical conversation. When the time comes, your role is to listen. Good managers will use this conversation and subsequent pre-departure chats, to learn a lot about the position, the organization and themselves as a manager, gaining rich feedback for improving organizational culture and retention strategies. Focusing on retention is important, but people will leave for reasons you can never anticipate. So instead, try to create a workplace environment where departures don’t equate to disruption. I always consider it a win when employees leave with some measure of regret. I know my role is to be supportive. Want to learn more about exit interviews? See 14 of the Best Employee Exit Interview Questions to Ask.
The great benefit of a smooth transition is that employers and employees don’t cut off opportunities to work together again one day. The future is unwritten, and it’s not uncommon for employees to “boomerang” back to a former organization. As a “boomeranger” myself, I know sometimes you need to leave a job and see what the wider world offers to learn what you’re really looking for. Great organizations will strive to be that fondly remembered employer, and future-focused employees may want to keep the door open. Both parties must make an effort — and the employer can take the first step. Here are some ideas: Remind exiting employees they’re welcome if they see an opportunity to return and ask them to stay in touch and follow the company on social media.Invite them to refer others for positions in the company, keeping communication lines open.Consider creating an alumni mailing list. If you don’t keep in touch with former employees, they may never consider coming back. Job resignations come with bittersweet farewells tempered by hopeful prospects ahead — for everyone involved. Recognizing this fact can help pave the way for resignation conversations that keep partings positive and bridges unburned, welcoming a return crossing.